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Who Better To Love: Chapter 8
Rome Wasn't Built in a Day
Disclaimer: I own nothing but myself and my own ideas.
Rating: R (for swearing)
Please see links to the first seven chapters "under the cut"
Dedication: This chapter is dedicated to Jess and Dave, you pestered me endlessly! WBTL WBTL WBTL :P
For those of you who haven't read the previous chapters, please do!
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Who Better To Love Ch 8: Rome Wasn't Built in a Day
Looking out of the dark windows of the black SUV, he spotted the small crowd a block away. There had been photoshoots where he wrapped his arms around her, and laughed with her playfully on a zebra-striped pillow. She teased him about his shiny MTV suit, and he wore it especially for her at their next event. They answered questions about each other for interviews, took friendly photographs, and enjoyed cordial conversations. They were playing at being just friends again, and they hoped they could pull it off. They had to pull it off, because it was all they had now. There were always people around, not a moment alone, and tonight would be no exception. It had to be that way. Except, all he wanted was to steal a quiet word away from listening ears and watchful eyes.
There she was, in black, looking as beautiful as always. God, the cut of that top! How was he going to keep his eyes off of her? He greeted friends and new associates with hugs, but her eyes caught his immediately. She wrapped her arms around him, in a warm embrace. There had been awkwardness, not a lot but some, since the Oprah show. It wasn’t that they were uncomfortable together, but that they each felt like they were walking on eggshells. The easiness between them was beginning to return, but there was still a tension, and a need to be extra attentive to one another. They had to figure out who they were and what they were, all over again. They were rebuilding, and it wasn’t going to happen overnight.
She told him that he looked good, as he took her hand and stood back to admire her whole figure. He looked her up and down before saying that she looked beautiful. There were words spoken, not quite caught by the microphone edging closer to them; words quickly halted to not give anything away. Arms around each other, flashes popping, they smiled. The smiles were for the cameras, but the warmth of each other’s arms was just their own. It was a warmth they had both been missing.
They spent the evening on display, answering questions, selling a movie and themselves. They had become best friends, was the standard line. They hoped that no one could tell. Before each clip, he would take her hand and lead her to the floor in front of the large screen. Waiting for her to sit, legs crossed beneath her, he joined her, sitting close, his thigh brushing up against hers. In front of all those people, they shared the tenderest, closest time they had in over a month.
Leaning over to her, he whispered, “I’m sorry I didn’t call you back. I-“
“It’s ok,” she answered, focusing on the screen in front of them.
“No, it’s not.”
“You’re right, it’s not,” she answered, turning to face him, an edge to her voice.
“Nik, I-“
“No excuses. You didn’t get back to me. I waited for 3 days and you didn’t call me back. I’m sure you had a reason, but I really don’t want to hear it.”
“I’m sorry,” he looked back to the screen, as it faded to black with the MC’s voice booming over the microphone, and they returned to their stools.
During the next clip, he turned to her, as they sat together on the floor, leaning in close again. “Sometimes, I’m just… I’m not sure what to do.”
“What do you mean?”
“I don’t know who we are anymore.”
“Me neither, Zac. That’s what we have to figure out.”
“Nik, I still-“ and he sought something in her eyes.
“I know…,” and she looked away, biting her lip. After a short pause, she said, “Zac, more than anything, we’re friends, right? That means more to me than anything else.” He nodded. “And, next time I leave you a message, just call me, okay?”
He smiled crookedly and nodded. Lifting his hand from his lap, he reached over subtly and quickly squeezed her own, as the lights came on again. Still holding her hand, he helped her up from the floor, and walked with her to the stools, only letting go when she was seated.
*~*~*~*~*
A few weeks later, they were back in the city where it had all started for them: Toronto. The streets, the buildings, the people: it was home in so many ways. And they only had two days to soak it all in.
In London, through days of interviews and appearances, they had found a new rapport when they were together in crowds, in front of cameras. Their hands reached out for each other, their eyes were all over each other. But, on their own, in times of quiet, there was a distance that they painstakingly maintained. That distance started to tighten around them in Toronto.
Riding in the back of a limo, returning to the hotel where they would be sitting through several hours of interviews, Nikki pulled a sheet of paper from her bag. Handing it to Zac, she asked, “Do you really feel this way?” He looked at her quizzically, then read the page. It was copy from an upcoming article that would appear in various newspapers and on entertainment sites. He skimmed over the words, a smile spreading across his face.
"I love girls who are happy and healthy with curves. . . . What it comes down to, as cliché and as cheesy as it sounds, when a guy gets to seriously know a girl, the things that he likes are much deeper, beyond the surface. . . . The hard part is getting to know someone first. It's like there's some prerequisite with looks that should be abolished."
“I do believe that. You know I do.” There was a warmth in his voice that she only heard in her memories now.
Nikki tried hard to hold in her smile, not wanting him to see how happy his words made her. She had been working hard to move on, focus on the future with Bryan, focus on being her own person. She reached for the page when he pulled it out of her reach. He had continued to read the article, coming to some words of her own.
"Everyone's definition of beauty is different, and why can't a gorgeous heartthrob be with a plus-size girl? Why not?" Blonsky says. "I think it's all about the connection between the people. You never know what lies in the stars. It could happen."
“Nik?” he asked, his gaze returning to her. She realized what he had read, and looked away, her cheeks reddening. “I guess we both give away too much, huh?” he said, softly, unconsciously folding the paper in half and returning it to her. The remainder of the ride, his mind was racing furiously with thoughts of her, of them; thoughts he had been trying hard to keep pushed down for months.
Settling in comfortably to their seats, the first interviewer observed them from a distance before she introduced herself. She remarked on their closeness, their affection, the spark that was obvious to anyone with eyes. What exactly was there between these two, she wondered.
The interviews continued, some for television, some for newspapers, magazines, websites. Most of the time they were asked the same questions, and gave the same answers. Then came someone different. A tall, dark-skinned young man sat down and introduced himself. Zane, too, had observed Nikki and Zac before taking his seat, and, being a little more daring (or perhaps inexperienced) than some of the other interviewers, when the opportunity arose, he took the plunge. He knew that they would maintain that they were just best friends, but he was dying to see how they would react to the question: “…you like big girls.” And when Zac immediately said, “Yeahhhhh,” then became flustered, and Nikki said, “Yeah, he does,” Zane had all the answer he needed right there.
It had been their last interview of the session, and they were whisked away to the Much Music studio for a live appearance on the Much On Demand video request program. There was an energy between them that had been building all day. Zac couldn’t take his eyes off of her in their first interview of the morning, even when Elijah tapped his foot. He loved listening to her, watching her expressions and how animated she became, how passionate she was about this movie and how her dreams were coming true. And this energy had become more intense throughout the day.
Standing backstage, Zac grabbed her arm and pulled her towards him as she passed by. “What?” Nikki asked, confusedly, as he pulled her behind some equipment.
“You amaze me, you know.”
“Me?” she laughed. “Why?”
“Everything about you. Everything you say, everything you do. I’ve never known anyone so courageous, so confident. I don’t think I’ve told you that enough. Everything I said, I was talking about you, you know that, right? Everything I said I like in a girl, you know I was thinking of you?”
She looked away. Her heart was beating quickly, and her thoughts were racing. When she turned to face him again, she mumbled, “You gave me that.”
“What? What did I give you?”
“Confidence.”
“Me?” he asked, incredulously.
“Yeah, you. I mean, I wasn’t shy before or anything, but you filled me with a confidence I never had before. Remember that coin I gave you?” He nodded, his hand reaching into his pocket and pulling it out. She smiled and closed her hand around his. “I gave you that, the most precious thing I owned, because you gave me something just as precious. You made me feel like, like I was worth something, like I was wanted.” He tried to protest, but she put her finger to his mouth to silence him. “I never felt like that before. Not in that way. Whatever happened since then, we’ll get through it, but you gave me something no one else had before.”
“You made me feel things I never felt before, either, Nik.” There were memories in his eyes. “And now all we can do is flirt in front of cameras.”
He could feel her pulse in her warm hand wrapped around his. He reached his other arm around her and held her to him. She quickly pulled away, taking a step back. “Zac, we can’t-“
“Nikki, can I kiss you? Please?” he asked, with urgency in his voice.
“No! Zac, I didn’t say that because I wanted something to…. We can’t! You know that!” Nikki turned and took a running step away from him. He reached his arm out and linked her elbow, moving in front of her.
“Just once? Come on, you know you want to. Just once?” he asked, laughing.
“No way!”
He scrunched his nose at her and asked again. She laughed at the face he made, and allowed his arms to settle around her waist. “Friends don’t kiss,” she scolded, teasingly.
“Just a quick one?” he asked.
“Maybe later,” and she stuck out her tongue at him playfully, breaking from his arms. He took in a deep breath, and followed her out to the set.
“A quick one?” It had happened. Those words, his words, coming from her mouth. Matte had asked if their kiss was natural enough to do it again on television. Zac had opened the door to the dare, when he brought up the kiss. Of course, kissing her had been at the front of his mind throughout the show. But he hadn’t thought his words through, and now he was about to kiss her on live TV. There was a light in her eyes that thrilled him. He realized immediately that this was his chance, the only chance she was going to give him, and he was damned if he was going to waste it. He went for it. When their lips met, hers were surprisingly opened. His hand was in her hair, and as she pulled away, smiling, he held her head firmly, bringing it back to his own. His tongue jutted out, grazing her lip, and he kissed her again, and again. When they broke the kiss, she laughed.
“I’m in so much trouble.” He had gotten carried away, but it was worth it.
*~*~*~*~*
The next day, Zac reconsidered. He wasn’t sure it had been worth it after all. Everyone was talking about the kiss. His friends were teasing him. His family was questioning him. Vanessa was the only one that didn’t seem to be phased by it. She had never considered Nikki a rival, in spite of the rumours that had begun to spread about them.
Nikki had gotten him, and, when that nosy Penacoli brought it up, he turned the joke back on her. “She’s like my sister,” he maintained. When he wiped his lips, he had gone too far.
They danced and mingled and took photos at the after party. They laughed together about the reaction to their kiss, and they celebrated the reception that the movie had received by the audience. It wasn’t until Zac left for home that Brittany pulled Nikki aside. She had managed to by-pass the Extra camera, but she did stop her publicist so she could listen to what Zac had to say. Brittany was observant, and had a few things on Zac, like the latte incident, and she was ready to give him up if he hurt Nikki. She relayed the “sister” comment and mouth-wiping to Nikki, after they shared a dance. Like Elijah, Brittany didn’t know anything for certain, but she had always believed something more than friendship was between Zac and Nikki. Brittany had struggled with whether or not to tell Nikki, but she thought it would be better to hear it from her than watch it on television the next day.
Nikki shrugged it off, not wanting to let anything like that interrupt the fun she was having, the high she was on. She was also afraid to give anything away to Brittany. But it festered in her all night, and through the next day. It was on her mind throughout the DVD commentary she recorded with Adam, until she sat down with her family to watch the evening entertainment shows. And then she saw it. Not only had he said she was like his sister, but he wiped his mouth, like he had been grossed out. She was floored. Her parents saw that she was upset, but they just assumed it was from the broken heart of a crush. They had no idea.
“I’m taking Rocky out for a walk. I’ll be back later,” she called, as she let the hotel room door close behind her. She was gone before her parents had even looked up.
“Hello?” He knew it was her. And he knew why she was calling.
“Don’t hello me, you fucking bastard!” she yelled into her cell phone, as she turned the corner from her hotel.
“Nik, I-“
“Enough! Christ, enough! It’s one thing that you used your fucking brother and sister line on me, from that fucking High School piece of shit, but you wiped your mouth? You wiped your mouth, you asshole! You begged me to kiss you, and now the whole fucking world will think I forced you into it, and you hated it!” She continued to shout at him, her New York accent thick with anger.
“Nik, I-“
“Like I don’t get enough as it is? Like I don’t get people saying shit about me all the time now? I’m the fat girl that could never get a guy like you, because there’s no way in hell he’d want me. Well, you wanted me, jackass, and you had me, and you still want me! I could have you right now if I wanted, and you damn well know it. FUCK!!! You make me so fucking fed up sometimes, you fucking chicken shit!” and she ended the call.
He tried for several hours to get a hold of her, but she had turned her phone off. He left messages, apologizing, explaining how he hadn’t expected the question, he didn’t know what to say, he thought he was turning the joke back on her, that he really hadn’t thought at all. That he was a fucking jackass that didn’t deserve her. But most of all, would she forgive him. Would she forgive him.
Would she forgive him?
Rome Wasn't Built in a Day
Disclaimer: I own nothing but myself and my own ideas.
Rating: R (for swearing)
Please see links to the first seven chapters "under the cut"
Dedication: This chapter is dedicated to Jess and Dave, you pestered me endlessly! WBTL WBTL WBTL :P
For those of you who haven't read the previous chapters, please do!
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Who Better To Love Ch 8: Rome Wasn't Built in a Day
Looking out of the dark windows of the black SUV, he spotted the small crowd a block away. There had been photoshoots where he wrapped his arms around her, and laughed with her playfully on a zebra-striped pillow. She teased him about his shiny MTV suit, and he wore it especially for her at their next event. They answered questions about each other for interviews, took friendly photographs, and enjoyed cordial conversations. They were playing at being just friends again, and they hoped they could pull it off. They had to pull it off, because it was all they had now. There were always people around, not a moment alone, and tonight would be no exception. It had to be that way. Except, all he wanted was to steal a quiet word away from listening ears and watchful eyes.
There she was, in black, looking as beautiful as always. God, the cut of that top! How was he going to keep his eyes off of her? He greeted friends and new associates with hugs, but her eyes caught his immediately. She wrapped her arms around him, in a warm embrace. There had been awkwardness, not a lot but some, since the Oprah show. It wasn’t that they were uncomfortable together, but that they each felt like they were walking on eggshells. The easiness between them was beginning to return, but there was still a tension, and a need to be extra attentive to one another. They had to figure out who they were and what they were, all over again. They were rebuilding, and it wasn’t going to happen overnight.
She told him that he looked good, as he took her hand and stood back to admire her whole figure. He looked her up and down before saying that she looked beautiful. There were words spoken, not quite caught by the microphone edging closer to them; words quickly halted to not give anything away. Arms around each other, flashes popping, they smiled. The smiles were for the cameras, but the warmth of each other’s arms was just their own. It was a warmth they had both been missing.
They spent the evening on display, answering questions, selling a movie and themselves. They had become best friends, was the standard line. They hoped that no one could tell. Before each clip, he would take her hand and lead her to the floor in front of the large screen. Waiting for her to sit, legs crossed beneath her, he joined her, sitting close, his thigh brushing up against hers. In front of all those people, they shared the tenderest, closest time they had in over a month.
Leaning over to her, he whispered, “I’m sorry I didn’t call you back. I-“
“It’s ok,” she answered, focusing on the screen in front of them.
“No, it’s not.”
“You’re right, it’s not,” she answered, turning to face him, an edge to her voice.
“Nik, I-“
“No excuses. You didn’t get back to me. I waited for 3 days and you didn’t call me back. I’m sure you had a reason, but I really don’t want to hear it.”
“I’m sorry,” he looked back to the screen, as it faded to black with the MC’s voice booming over the microphone, and they returned to their stools.
During the next clip, he turned to her, as they sat together on the floor, leaning in close again. “Sometimes, I’m just… I’m not sure what to do.”
“What do you mean?”
“I don’t know who we are anymore.”
“Me neither, Zac. That’s what we have to figure out.”
“Nik, I still-“ and he sought something in her eyes.
“I know…,” and she looked away, biting her lip. After a short pause, she said, “Zac, more than anything, we’re friends, right? That means more to me than anything else.” He nodded. “And, next time I leave you a message, just call me, okay?”
He smiled crookedly and nodded. Lifting his hand from his lap, he reached over subtly and quickly squeezed her own, as the lights came on again. Still holding her hand, he helped her up from the floor, and walked with her to the stools, only letting go when she was seated.
*~*~*~*~*
A few weeks later, they were back in the city where it had all started for them: Toronto. The streets, the buildings, the people: it was home in so many ways. And they only had two days to soak it all in.
In London, through days of interviews and appearances, they had found a new rapport when they were together in crowds, in front of cameras. Their hands reached out for each other, their eyes were all over each other. But, on their own, in times of quiet, there was a distance that they painstakingly maintained. That distance started to tighten around them in Toronto.
Riding in the back of a limo, returning to the hotel where they would be sitting through several hours of interviews, Nikki pulled a sheet of paper from her bag. Handing it to Zac, she asked, “Do you really feel this way?” He looked at her quizzically, then read the page. It was copy from an upcoming article that would appear in various newspapers and on entertainment sites. He skimmed over the words, a smile spreading across his face.
“I do believe that. You know I do.” There was a warmth in his voice that she only heard in her memories now.
Nikki tried hard to hold in her smile, not wanting him to see how happy his words made her. She had been working hard to move on, focus on the future with Bryan, focus on being her own person. She reached for the page when he pulled it out of her reach. He had continued to read the article, coming to some words of her own.
“Nik?” he asked, his gaze returning to her. She realized what he had read, and looked away, her cheeks reddening. “I guess we both give away too much, huh?” he said, softly, unconsciously folding the paper in half and returning it to her. The remainder of the ride, his mind was racing furiously with thoughts of her, of them; thoughts he had been trying hard to keep pushed down for months.
Settling in comfortably to their seats, the first interviewer observed them from a distance before she introduced herself. She remarked on their closeness, their affection, the spark that was obvious to anyone with eyes. What exactly was there between these two, she wondered.
The interviews continued, some for television, some for newspapers, magazines, websites. Most of the time they were asked the same questions, and gave the same answers. Then came someone different. A tall, dark-skinned young man sat down and introduced himself. Zane, too, had observed Nikki and Zac before taking his seat, and, being a little more daring (or perhaps inexperienced) than some of the other interviewers, when the opportunity arose, he took the plunge. He knew that they would maintain that they were just best friends, but he was dying to see how they would react to the question: “…you like big girls.” And when Zac immediately said, “Yeahhhhh,” then became flustered, and Nikki said, “Yeah, he does,” Zane had all the answer he needed right there.
It had been their last interview of the session, and they were whisked away to the Much Music studio for a live appearance on the Much On Demand video request program. There was an energy between them that had been building all day. Zac couldn’t take his eyes off of her in their first interview of the morning, even when Elijah tapped his foot. He loved listening to her, watching her expressions and how animated she became, how passionate she was about this movie and how her dreams were coming true. And this energy had become more intense throughout the day.
Standing backstage, Zac grabbed her arm and pulled her towards him as she passed by. “What?” Nikki asked, confusedly, as he pulled her behind some equipment.
“You amaze me, you know.”
“Me?” she laughed. “Why?”
“Everything about you. Everything you say, everything you do. I’ve never known anyone so courageous, so confident. I don’t think I’ve told you that enough. Everything I said, I was talking about you, you know that, right? Everything I said I like in a girl, you know I was thinking of you?”
She looked away. Her heart was beating quickly, and her thoughts were racing. When she turned to face him again, she mumbled, “You gave me that.”
“What? What did I give you?”
“Confidence.”
“Me?” he asked, incredulously.
“Yeah, you. I mean, I wasn’t shy before or anything, but you filled me with a confidence I never had before. Remember that coin I gave you?” He nodded, his hand reaching into his pocket and pulling it out. She smiled and closed her hand around his. “I gave you that, the most precious thing I owned, because you gave me something just as precious. You made me feel like, like I was worth something, like I was wanted.” He tried to protest, but she put her finger to his mouth to silence him. “I never felt like that before. Not in that way. Whatever happened since then, we’ll get through it, but you gave me something no one else had before.”
“You made me feel things I never felt before, either, Nik.” There were memories in his eyes. “And now all we can do is flirt in front of cameras.”
He could feel her pulse in her warm hand wrapped around his. He reached his other arm around her and held her to him. She quickly pulled away, taking a step back. “Zac, we can’t-“
“Nikki, can I kiss you? Please?” he asked, with urgency in his voice.
“No! Zac, I didn’t say that because I wanted something to…. We can’t! You know that!” Nikki turned and took a running step away from him. He reached his arm out and linked her elbow, moving in front of her.
“Just once? Come on, you know you want to. Just once?” he asked, laughing.
“No way!”
He scrunched his nose at her and asked again. She laughed at the face he made, and allowed his arms to settle around her waist. “Friends don’t kiss,” she scolded, teasingly.
“Just a quick one?” he asked.
“Maybe later,” and she stuck out her tongue at him playfully, breaking from his arms. He took in a deep breath, and followed her out to the set.
“A quick one?” It had happened. Those words, his words, coming from her mouth. Matte had asked if their kiss was natural enough to do it again on television. Zac had opened the door to the dare, when he brought up the kiss. Of course, kissing her had been at the front of his mind throughout the show. But he hadn’t thought his words through, and now he was about to kiss her on live TV. There was a light in her eyes that thrilled him. He realized immediately that this was his chance, the only chance she was going to give him, and he was damned if he was going to waste it. He went for it. When their lips met, hers were surprisingly opened. His hand was in her hair, and as she pulled away, smiling, he held her head firmly, bringing it back to his own. His tongue jutted out, grazing her lip, and he kissed her again, and again. When they broke the kiss, she laughed.
“I’m in so much trouble.” He had gotten carried away, but it was worth it.
*~*~*~*~*
The next day, Zac reconsidered. He wasn’t sure it had been worth it after all. Everyone was talking about the kiss. His friends were teasing him. His family was questioning him. Vanessa was the only one that didn’t seem to be phased by it. She had never considered Nikki a rival, in spite of the rumours that had begun to spread about them.
Nikki had gotten him, and, when that nosy Penacoli brought it up, he turned the joke back on her. “She’s like my sister,” he maintained. When he wiped his lips, he had gone too far.
They danced and mingled and took photos at the after party. They laughed together about the reaction to their kiss, and they celebrated the reception that the movie had received by the audience. It wasn’t until Zac left for home that Brittany pulled Nikki aside. She had managed to by-pass the Extra camera, but she did stop her publicist so she could listen to what Zac had to say. Brittany was observant, and had a few things on Zac, like the latte incident, and she was ready to give him up if he hurt Nikki. She relayed the “sister” comment and mouth-wiping to Nikki, after they shared a dance. Like Elijah, Brittany didn’t know anything for certain, but she had always believed something more than friendship was between Zac and Nikki. Brittany had struggled with whether or not to tell Nikki, but she thought it would be better to hear it from her than watch it on television the next day.
Nikki shrugged it off, not wanting to let anything like that interrupt the fun she was having, the high she was on. She was also afraid to give anything away to Brittany. But it festered in her all night, and through the next day. It was on her mind throughout the DVD commentary she recorded with Adam, until she sat down with her family to watch the evening entertainment shows. And then she saw it. Not only had he said she was like his sister, but he wiped his mouth, like he had been grossed out. She was floored. Her parents saw that she was upset, but they just assumed it was from the broken heart of a crush. They had no idea.
“I’m taking Rocky out for a walk. I’ll be back later,” she called, as she let the hotel room door close behind her. She was gone before her parents had even looked up.
“Hello?” He knew it was her. And he knew why she was calling.
“Don’t hello me, you fucking bastard!” she yelled into her cell phone, as she turned the corner from her hotel.
“Nik, I-“
“Enough! Christ, enough! It’s one thing that you used your fucking brother and sister line on me, from that fucking High School piece of shit, but you wiped your mouth? You wiped your mouth, you asshole! You begged me to kiss you, and now the whole fucking world will think I forced you into it, and you hated it!” She continued to shout at him, her New York accent thick with anger.
“Nik, I-“
“Like I don’t get enough as it is? Like I don’t get people saying shit about me all the time now? I’m the fat girl that could never get a guy like you, because there’s no way in hell he’d want me. Well, you wanted me, jackass, and you had me, and you still want me! I could have you right now if I wanted, and you damn well know it. FUCK!!! You make me so fucking fed up sometimes, you fucking chicken shit!” and she ended the call.
He tried for several hours to get a hold of her, but she had turned her phone off. He left messages, apologizing, explaining how he hadn’t expected the question, he didn’t know what to say, he thought he was turning the joke back on her, that he really hadn’t thought at all. That he was a fucking jackass that didn’t deserve her. But most of all, would she forgive him. Would she forgive him.
Would she forgive him?
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